Blogtober: Coming Out To Yourself



Hello again everyone, and welcome to the start of week 2 of my Blogtober challenge. If you missed any of last week’s blogging-themed posts, you can catch up on the links down below:









Today is the start of week 2, which is LGBT week.

To kick off this week of LGBT-themed posts, I would like to explore the topic of coming out. Originally, this was going to be just one post, but I have decided that I will instead split it into two posts, with part 1 today and part 2 coming up tomorrow.

I am dedicating today’s post to the topic of COMING OUT TO YOURSELF.

Before coming out to other people, there is a long process of coming out to yourself which most LGBTI people go through. This process can take a very long time, and can be both confusing and scary, but I hope the tips I share here can help out some of you who may be going through a tough time trying to figure yourselves out.

DON’T PANIC

I remember that when I was growing up, I sort of knew I had feelings for other boys and had a vague understanding of what “gay” meant, and it frightened me. I was so worried about it, particularly because I had been told, like most people are that life follows this sequence

Man meets woman à Man and woman get married à Man and woman have children

…and that anything else was wrong.

There were several times throughout my youth where I realised I felt different and each time I panicked about what my feelings meant and whether I would ever be able to tell anyone about them.

Looking back on it now, I would advise anyone who is questioning their sexuality or gender identity to first of all, not panic. There are thousands and thousands of other people (maybe millions) who have gone through/are going through exactly what you are feeling and there is nothing wrong with you. What you are feeling is perfectly natural and one day you will figure it out and everything will make sense, so don’t worry.

RESEARCH

If you aren’t quite sure what your feelings mean, I recommend researching it.

We live in a hugely advanced age where there are so many resources available to us. In just a few clicks we can find any information we need on the internet. There are so many organisations and websites which can help and support you in your journey of self-discovery.

Or, why not find a book from your local library or from certain retailers which deals with LGBTI issues? I recommend Ash Hardell’s ABCs of LGBT as a good source of information, as it really explores the wide range of identities which exist under the LGBT umbrella

Not only will researching these things help you out in terms of discovering what you are, they can also make you aware of the fact that you aren’t alone in the way you’re feeling.

Research can be so useful to you if you want to know more about LGBTI people and identities.

TAKE YOUR TIME

It is so important that you take as much time as you need to find yourself.

Some people realise who they are when they’re young, others later on in life. There really is no time limit or fixed age at which you figure yourself out, so don’t feel obliged to work out who you are.

Also, if you identify one way at one point in your life and then as something else later on, this is perfectly fine. I have been through it myself and thousands of others go through the same thing as well. I’m going to be putting up a post about changing identities later in the week where I’ll go into this a bit more.

NEVER FEEL LIKE YOU’RE WORTH NOTHING

Whatever you are going through, however you identify or think you identify, remember this.

There is nothing wrong with you or what you are feeling. You are important, you are valid and you are worth it so never feel like you are wrong or unimportant.



Those are my tips for when you are coming out to yourself. If you have any tips of your own or feel like I’ve missed something out, please let me know in the comments. Or, if you prefer, you can Tweet me your suggestions (@TrentBlogs).

Part 2 of this post – Coming Out to the World – will be up tomorrow so keep an eye out for that. Until then, keep positive, keep smiling, and above all, keep believing!

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